Isaiah’s friend “I thought I saw Isaiah today. I know that’s crazy but I almost ran up to the boy and throw my arms around him.”
It’s not hard for me to understand – it happens to me all the time. I see boys that look like him and take a second look with my heart stopping a beat. I see him in pictures. There are moments that just strike a memory. Maybe food, clothes, smells, an activity that we did together. Sometimes it strikes laughter. Sometimes it brings tears. It always leaves a hollow pit in my stomach.
It’s a loss. I know it’s normal. I’m not suffering every day but there are constant reminders. There are pictures around the house – with and without him. Which ones hurt more? I don’t know.
I still get angry. Any loss hurts. Suicide hurts more because it was intentional. It could have been stopped.
Loss. Memories. Healing. Understanding. Tomorrow it will repeat.