Happy to be old, fat and bald

If you ask any young man about fears in life they will include not wanting to grow old, fat and bald.  To a young man, those three words represent death or at least the finale of living.  It means to give up, give in, submit, or have any value.  To a healthy young man there is nothing good about it.

The reason that they feel like that is because they haven’t reached it yet.  Imagine being a fetus in the nice comfy belly of your mother.  Would any fetus say “Hey, let’s get pushed out through a tiny birth canal and get slapped around till I cry”?

I’ve made it to the old, fat and bald stage and it’s not that bad.  I’m not happy about being bald but I don’t miss blow drying my hair like I did in college.  I’m not happy about being fat but it is easier to eat a donut than running.  Old – well, the alternative is death.  I certainly don’t want to be a teenager again.  Maybe thirty.  Thirty was nice except for sleepless nights with an infant.

I’m not senile yet.  I still have most of my teeth.  I’m semi diabetic but fighting it.  My heart is a mess but I’m hoping technology stays ahead of me to keep me alive.  I can’t really run but I do ok walking.   I also don’t need to worry about a lot of things that I worried about when I was younger.  It’s peaceful in the OFB club.  Women don’t bother me.  I don’t need to date.  I don’t need to impress anyone.  It would be nice to have more money but hey you can’t have everything.

If you’re young don’t worry about the OFB club.  It will come sooner or later.  I probably won’t be here when you get here but I’ll leave the light on.

Psalm 92:14   

They will still bear fruit in old age,
    they will stay fresh and green,




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